I can’t stress often enough how important it is for one to work on both self-confidence and compassion, the same way he or she would work on developing creative skills and a career. These things work simultaneously, and the better you are at recognizing the value of yourself and others, the better you will be at using this knowledge to garner success.

The same holds true in relationships. When two people enter a relationship, both have something valuable to contribute, which creates an environment that is stimulating and inspires healthy growth between them. But sometimes people enter a relationship with their own perceived weaknesses, whether consciously or subconsciously, and will use another person to compensate for that lack or shortcoming. The problem is that this creates a breeding ground for insecurity. In its most extreme form, it can lead to domestic violence.

Aryn Quinn recently emailed me about her nonprofit organization, Beauty Cares, which helps to fight against domestic violence. Beauty Cares offers a Breakthrough Experience program, which strives to transform survivors of domestic abuse from the inside out. Those who had become broken and distrustful can begin to appreciate the beauty in themselves and in the world again.

I love any cause that supports the personal growth of women and men in general; it’s just as important that the progenitors of domestic violence have programs that help them see the beauty in their own self. Perhaps then they wouldn’t feel so threatened to have to attack a person who, at the core, is neither greater nor lesser than they are.

Aryn also sent this video called Make Under, which is a provocative depiction of the effects of abuse. Good for you, Aryn, for providing a welcoming home for domestic violence victims.